happy hallow's eve!

hey y'all! i didn't mean to disappear on ya... just haven't had much to blog about!
so, last week i mentioned that i was going to try my hardest to do two-a-days on tuesday and thursday. well, tuesday morning rolled around and my alarm went off at 5:40 and i.... turned that bitch off without hesitation! i just CAN'T do it! i really physically can't! and i'm ok with that. but it just means i have to put in a few longer workouts at the gym to make up for it.

i did get my 3 "runs" in. if you can call them runs, ha! i restarted the c25k over, so its more of a jog/walk. but i'll get there! i also did step class on monday and body pump on thursday. this week i'm going to try to get in 4 runs, but my shins are still a little sore from last week, so hopefully they will hold up for me! i freaking hate shins! i'm hoping and praying that once i stick with running consistently the pain will go away. i've never stuck it out and kept it up so i'm thinking that may be the problem. i'm also going to work on strengthening my calves as i know that can be a problem. along with taking an aspirin before my run, stretching a lot better before and after, and icing those babies up post-run. hopefully it will go away within the month. i just gotta stick it out!!

last week i ate very good and stuck to my diet about 90%! on tuesday i went over to heather's with our friend amanda for a girls night. so besides the few glasses of wine i had there, and the pack of skittles i brought over, i was a very good girl. and because of that, i lost another 2 lbs! woohoo! so that's a total of 4 lbs in 2 weeks! i'm hoping to be down another 2 lbs by this weeks weigh-in. i know those 2 lbs will starting dropping to 1 soon enough, but i hope not too soon!

xxoo

last week's weigh-in & weekend recap

hello ladies! hope everyone had a fab weekend!
last friday was weigh-in day... i lost about 2 lbs. i was ok with this for a few different reasons.... the 1st being that i didn't workout much at all. so i wasn't expecting a big loss. the 2nd reason being that i ate a slice of cake thursday at work... and then again that night. and i also had a heavier dinner thursday. sooo 2 lbs wasn't looking that bad to me! i didn't weigh-in this morning but im certain those 2 lbs are back!  here's why:

friday night the babe and i went to chili's. i ordered the "lighter santa fe wrap" with corn on the cob. i only had a few bites of the corn but ate the whole wrap. i just checked the calories for the wrap on chili's website.... 560 calories! yiiiikes. chili's is definitely one of the worse places to eat on a diet. but it's one of our favs! saturday morning we woke up bright and early to head out to the susan komen 5k in new orleans. my shins were super sore friday night and i was worried i wouldn't be able to run. well when i woke up that morning they were still hurting pretty bad. i decided to sit out and wait for everyone to finish. i know that if i would have ran, not only would it have taken me forever because i couldn't even walk fast, but they would be even worse after! and we still had the rest of the day to walk around and hang out! everyone did great! i'm so proud of my friends :) we hung around for a little bit and enjoyed the free beer.

then we headed to one of our favorite spots in the city, the rum house. seriously, if you are in the area you HAVE to try it. you will not be sorry. while there i had 2 yummy fruity rum drinks (1 billion calories each im sure) and some delicious tacos. the majority of the group headed home after lunch, and it was just mike & i and heather and her husband. we walked down to a bar for the boys could finish up the lsu game. then headed home.

once we got home we took a quick nap! it was so glorious :) i woke up and went to pick up dinner. my office bought fundraiser tickets for steak dinners and gave me a couple on friday. it was perfect as i knew i wouldn't want to cook that night! steak, cheesy potatoes, smothered green beans & texas toast! yea, my mouth is watering right now. it was delicious and i ate every bite of it. so that my friends is why i know for sure those 2 lbs are back!

yesterday was spent grocery shopping, cleaning and catching up on the dvr. this week i plan on joining elle noel on her two-a-days on tuesday and thursday. y'all.... this is gonna be really really hard for me. i am not a morning person at all. at all! i'm very much a night owl and go to bed around midnight on work nights. i'll definitely be taking some melatonin tonight and hopefully getting in bed for 10! i'll let ya know how it goes! here is my workout schedule for the week:

monday-
60 minute step class
20 minute on the elliptical

tuesday-
am: 30 min jog
pm: 60 min body pump class

wednesday-
60 min spin class

thursday-
am: 30 min jog
pm: 60 min body pump

friday-
60 min on the elliptical

saturday-
45 min barre class
30 min jog

sunday-
REST


here's to hoping i can stick with this! it's definitely going to be hard!

xxoo

weekend wrap-up & goals

good morning friends! hope everyone had a fabulous weekend. mine was pretty busy! friday night we had mike's brother, sister-in-law and kids over for dinner and games. we had bbq chicken breasts wrapped in bacon (omg!) grilled corn on the cob, cajun sausage and smothered yellow & zucchini squash. everything was so yummy! we played a couple of games before they had to head home to put the boys to bed. saturday night was my 3rd cousins wedding in harahan (about an hr drive) so we headed that way when the babe got home from work. we didn't stay long and ended up popping into a local bar when we got back into town to meet up with a couple of friends. it was a very fun & unexpected night! sunday i went over to my friend tiffini's house to help her host her mom's bridal shower. y'all, why is shower food so good? and how is it possible to eat 1,000 of those little tiny sandwiches!? those things are so addicting, i cant ever just have a couple!

before heading out to the wedding saturday night

so as you can tell, i did not eat good this weekend. i knew i really wouldn't be able to and that it would be especially hard at the shower, so i let myself have "1 last meal" before i committed to making changes. starting today im going to start putting 110% into getting in shape. there is no more time for excuses! im 26 years old and it is just going to get harder to lose weight the closer i get to 30. (cannot believe that is in 4 short years! AHHHH!) i know that it is SO hard to have a social life and lose weight. this is the thing i struggle with the most. i cant just sit around while everyone else has beers and cocktails and be sober sally. so i really have to be strict throughout the week and NEVER miss a workout. i also need to plan a lot better for the weekends. if i know we are going out with friends on saturday night then i need to start getting in a hard core workout that morning. and of course limit myself on the # of drinks i have that night. i have to really start thinking about the repercussions before i cheat or skip a workout. i cant forget about the bigger picture!

so like i said in my last post, my first goal is to lose 15 lbs by january 1st. i'd really love to lose 20 by then but with the holidays coming up i know im going to have lots of slip ups. im going to stick to 1200 calories a day (i use my fitness pal to track. you can add me if you like! username is darlingvictoria). my workout goal is to workout 6 days a week. im still trying to figure out exactly what i want to do on what day, but i definitely need to stick to 6 days with sundays being my rest day. i'm going to do a weekly weigh-in here on my blog on friday mornings so y'all will know how im doing. so here goes nothing! i'd really love any kind of encouragement, motivation or tips you'd like to leave me!

xxoo

my big fat "fat" story

i didnt grow up in a healthy eating household. my mom very rarely cooked and when she did it was something bad. we had takeout almost everyday of the week. chinese, popeyes chicken, mcdonalds... we had it all. my parents split up when i was 8 years old. i dont really remember how i felt about food before that. i was a kid, i ate when i was hungry and then ran off those calories outside. it never was really an issue. looking back at pictures, i was an average sized child. when my parents split up, we moved an hour away to my grandparents house. thats where the problem began. living with a full blooded italian grandmaw. but man did i enjoy it! what is it about grandparents? they always want you to eat, eat, eat! (still to this day, when i visit her she trys to give me everything in her fridge.)

since then i've always been the bigger girl. (15-20 lbs overweight) in middle school i was a size 8 while all the other girls were a 2. i've never been tiny. in high school i was again the bigger girl. of course i dont mean the biggest girl in the room, but i've always been bigger than the majority of my friends. i never really got picked on for my size, which im very thankful for of course. (but maybe if i had, i would have done something about it back then. probably not.) high school is where i really started feeling down on myself. i definitely was not happy with my body and often compared myself to others. when my high school boyfriend and i broke up the first time i was heartbroken. i barely ate anything and even went through a little stage of bulimia. we got back together for awhile but ended things for good shortly after. this breakup was not like the last, i definitely ate my feelings this time. i gained the 15 lbs back that i had lost the first time. a few months later i started seeing a new guy and gained another 15 lbs in happy relationship weight. we dated for over 2 years and during that time i gained another 10-15 lbs while working at a pizza place. at this time i was the biggest i had ever been. close to 170 (i'm 5ft). me and that boyfriend eventually broke up and i had lost a little bit of weight, maybe 10 lbs. i was 18 years old and started going out every night and drinking, eating fast food at 2am and sleeping all day. doing no physical activity what so ever.  i dont know how i didnt blow up this time around! i even managed to lose a little bit, about 10 lbs. this is around the time i met mike. i was smitten :) i was really in love with him from very early on and we were happy. but we had a very very rocky relationship in the beginning. we broke up around 5-6 times in the first 2 years. so as you can imagine, my weight went up and down as did our roller coaster relationship. we've been together for over 7 years now (march will make 8) and im now 26.

 over the course of ages 18-26 i have tried pretty much every diet out there. adkins, southbeach, weight watchers, 17 day diet and diet pills. the last time we broke up which was early 2007 i got down to my lowest adult weight, 138, by using diet pills and working out a couple times a week. i was finally feeling good about myself! i wanted to lose a little bit more, maybe 10-15 lbs but i was really happy. well we ended up reuniting and so did my weight and i. in early 2009 me and mike along with 2 of our friends booked a cruise. my friend tiffini is petitie and i didnt not want to be standing next to that skinny bitch in a bikini! from march-may of that year i lost 20 lbs with the help of diet pills (phentermine). then we went on the cruise and ate and drank for 7 days straight. once we got back i kept most of it off but by the end of the year i was back up to 160 again. between then and now i've lost and gained the same 10 lbs over and over again. in novemeber of last year i did the 17 day diet. i have to say, this is a really great diet. i lost 13 lbs (the healthy way for a change!) in about 4 weeks. i was feeling good again! i had about 15 more lbs i wanted to lose until i could feel comfortable and confident. but thanksgiving came.... and then christmas... you get the hint. holiday food!  i gained that weight back.

so here i am. 26 years old. fat & unhappy. i really want and NEED to do something for good this time. i want to be fit, healthy & happy. i want to give mike the hot girlfriend he deserves. i want to feel good about myself and be able to wear the clothes i want. i want to be the fit girl and not the big girl! i need help. i need encouragement. i NEED CHANGE. i need to make this lifestyle change and keep it off for good. i cant be unhappy and unhealthy another day. according to my bmi i am considered obese. i'd like to lose a total of 30 lbs. i'd have to lose almost 20 lbs to be in the overweight category and 40 lbs to be in the normal category. but its not really about the number to me. my first goal is 15 lbs by january 1st (trying to be realistic with the holidays coming up).
so, here we go again.....

ww's weigh-in: week 8

.4lbs lost. at this point i honestly have barely been trying. life is just getting in the way too much right now. going out to eat, picking up something quick for dinner. i was also sick a couple days last week so i didnt workout my normal 4 days and the times i did i took it easy. so im just happy i didnt gain! i cant let excuses get in the way anymore though. and i definitely need to try harder. we are leaving next wednesday for our trip and when we get back i need to be hardcore with my workouts and stricter with my diet. i will definitely be enjoying some delicious food in nashville next week, but i do plan on working out at least twice at our timeshares gym. that way i will feel at least a little less guilty about the fried chicken and bbq im hoping to eat :)

xxoo

ww's weigh-in: week 7

.2 lbs lost. well i was definitely expecting a gain so im pretty happy with this! although of course i wanted a lose. im thinking next week i'll be down a couple lbs. 1 step forward 2 steps back right? story of my life! only 2 more weigh-ins before our trip! i originally wanted to be down 15 lbs by then but yeaaaa that aint happening since im back down to a little over a 6 lb lose. i just have to keep reminding myself this when i want to indulge: nothing tastes better then being skinny/fit/healthy. i dont have to eat this today, i will still be alive tomorrow. and if not, at least i'll die a little skinnier.

most people say that dont want to be skinny, they just want to be healthy. blah blah blah. im sure that is the case for some. but lets be honest... i wont be healthy unless in skinny(ish). if i worked out enough to be healthy then i would be skinny! i think ive said the word skinny a few too many times in this post. i dont want to be skin and bones. i have a curvy body and am proud of it! i would just like to be a hell of a lot less flabby. less cellulite would be awesome too! my ideal body would be that of kim kardarshian. she has tons of curves and is still sexy as hell. so heres to getting a kim body (minus the tits, i would need a boob job for that!)

xxoo

ww's weigh-in: week 6

2.5 gain. a gain?? a GAIN??? yea, it pretty much blows. im very disappointed. i knew i would have a gain this week but not this much! i did it to myself though. alcohol? yep i drank it. late night bacon cheese fries dipped in ranch? yep i ate it. carrot cake cheesecake? yeppp, had that too. and all within 24 hrs. and all only 24 hrs before i had to weigh in. i think i need to change my weigh in days to friday instead of monday! i normally do very good mon-fri and then BAM! piggy mcpigg comes out to play. then i have no time to make up for it before my weigh in. i would be lying if i said i wasnt going to drink this weekend. you know that little thing called mardi gras? well its this weekend and its kind of a big deal to us louisianans. so we will be down in the french quarter drinking hand grenades, hurricanes and topping it all off with a couple lucky dogs. at least im being honest with myself right? i guess ill just have to be extra good until the weekend. because i cant NOT drink at mardi gras... right? i still have 3 mondays to weigh in before our trip so there is still time! im going to step up my workout this week also. here goes nothing!

xxoo

ww's weigh-in: week 5

image from weheartit

on monday january 17th i started weight watcher's. i didnt sign up or anything, im just doing it on my own. im following the older program... not the one that just came out. i have one of those little hand held calculators that tells you how many points something is and i bought a ww cookbook with over 500 recipes in it for dinner. to save us from spending a butt load and me having to cook every night, we eat the leftovers the next night instead of for lunch. i normally either eat a turkey sandwich or a frozen "smart ones" meal for lunch. it has the points right on the front! sooo easy! its a pretty easy program to follow. i really like it! i like that i can still eat "bad" food, just in small portions. and of course not too often! here is my weigh-in record so far:

week 1: 3.4 lbs lost
week 2: .6 lb gain
week 3: 1.6 lb loss
week 4: 1 lb loss
week 5: 3.6 lb loss

total = 9 lb loss

i really really wanted to lose 10 lbs by my 4th weigh in, so im pretty disappointed that im STILL not there. but thats also because i have been eating all my extra points every week (you get 32 extra points every week to use as you wish) and havent been pushing myself as much as i could at the gym. and i have nooo idea how i lost 3.6 this past week! i had a ton of mexican food & margaritas and a couple pieces of pizza this week. so if i can do all that and have that big of a loss, theres no reason to get discouraged! me and mike are going to nashville on march 23-26 to celebrate our 6 yr anniversary. i would LOVE to get to 15 lb loss by then. that leaves me 4 weeks. I.CAN.DO.THIS. im going to cut out all alcohol until then and really try not to use those damn extra points! im going to do a weight-in post every monday so y'all can follow along with me. wish me luck :)

xxoo